Whenever I get home the machine that is the scariest thing ever other than me...begins to talk and go on and on and its too psychotic. I have a mental breakdown most of the day.
The machine often has me obsessing and hearing about myself for hours and hours on in...
It sucks. And unbearable most of the days.
But today, I thought normal Juan. Without the extra satellite bullshit. That guy was normal, manic and bipolar most of the day but never grandiouse. The grandiouse after I broke my concentration or obsession was about his money, improving his life, house and also applying to things that he could actually do.
I suffered from a bipolar mania and the complexities of getting fucked by people that you would have to see everyday that weren't allowing you to work was utter shit. When I could have said fuck'em.
But I broke it; I obsessed today about what would have everything go away. The psychotic obsession, keeping me hysterical 24 hours a day, blahahaha.
I thought about just figure of money. I always used a million because I received a scam call about a million tax free. So I always, not often but always use that.
I think if I were given it today...What would I do and its pretty concerete now, so I don't obsess and stay psychotic about it.
If I had to face probation time in Houston because somehow people were able to successfully presses charges and I was still paid - to where they would be kept out of trouble...Which is extremely unlikely, cause it was all illegal. But let's say it happens. I am given a million tax free and forced just to do probation to where I had to stay in a market.
I would buy the Subway on Highway 6 near my former house. I would then finish my mba and teach fifteen classes a year. Three online and also three in the classroom setting, this would go on during the fall and spring. Then I would teach three during the summer. I would have approximately just >4 months off total. I would then make 45000 dollars that I would have to pay taxes on. So I would hold all my receipts. This would be at the community college level.
The three I would teach online would have to deal with basic math. The three classes I would teach in person would be basic economics. An intro, A macro and a Micro.
I would set my office hours at the subway, I'd own. I would 40 hours a week there. Because I want to keep part of the profit and also it keeps me out of the house. Cause I hated not doing anything with my life other than walking to the store and stealing bread for three years. Cause that's what innately happened. My life was ruined and people got the feds involved never to pay me.
My day would be pretty simple - I would wake up at the house that I was able to buy back. I would offer 20 grand cash and also pay it market value. Due to sentimental value. I would pay my taxes and hoa's and insurance for my entire life. 30 years, I smoke - drink and I am overweight, so I don't expect to live longer than 30 years. Back to the normal routine... I would wake up, like I said previously, around 4 am, go to a 24 hour gym, work out for three hours, then get my dry cleaning and get a coffee and a pack of cigarettes, Change and go to work. I then would go to work around 9 or a little later. I am tired of being so early to things cause I am so anxious to be in society that I would show up early. But I would work from 9-12... Three courses would be taught within that time.
I then would come home - Watch some television and or just play X box or just chill cause I am tired of thinking. Then I would go to work at 3. From 3 to 11; I would just make sandwhiches. Then I would do my study or office hours then.
I would have all my exams online but set a bell curve based on attendance. And make sure everyone passed cause its community college.
Friday at 11 pm when I walked out of work. I would not have to worry about responsibilities for 3 days. But on Saturday, I would drop off my Laundry and also mow the lawn. Go see Yaya and that's it. Other than that get into society without the pieces of shit that I never wanted in my life in the first place. Other than papa's and Salvador. So my neighbors will be like are they still doing that to him. And the answer will be no. They paid his fucking money and let this man breathe. Cause he was never that sick. He just hates people that know about him. Cause he doesn't do anything but eat, smoke cigarettes and hit on ho's broke and is nice to people. And they keep him psychotic and won't let him breathe while setting him up. He owns a gun and keeps it in his car, so if you hit him and try to play it off like its someone else - he can legally kill you and get away with. Like the HPD officer told him.
You don't control a man for money and ruin his corporate life for your gain. Wow, you met people and shit. How do you not pay a man for this and keep him psychotic the entire time.
Shit this is what I obsess about so I make it practical.
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